Posted by: geekycrochetmom | April 18, 2012

Crazy Me

Shortly after the peace and quiet of Holy Week, I found myself getting antsy and restless once again. On top of my work at the clinics/hospitals, I got caught up in the hustle and bustle of kumon center visits, piano lessons, violin lessons, anti-rabies shots, vet/pet shop visits, prayer meetings… I lose my breath just thinking about it.

Please don’t think of me as a bad mother. I love being able to spend more time with the offspring now that they’re on summer break. I am thankful for the blessings that allow us to give them lessons/ tutorials.

But just imagine a pre-menstrual, migraine-prone, middle aged mother cramming the kids into the backseat several times a week and driving them to and from their activities amidst constant fighting and yelling and bickering. Then add to that a broken down car aircon in 35 degree celsius heat**. (In case you’re wondering where hubby was, he’s out of town on a work-related trip and we’ll be back tonight – yahoo!).

Phone calls come anytime of day/night, text messages relay patient updates. Friends and relatives call and make “telephone consultations”.

I bring my crochet WIP with me and long to work quietly while waiting for the kids to finish lessons. But the (other waiting) mothers are quite friendly and chatty (again, conversations revolved around kids, schoolwork, teachers, summer activities) and I am too shy to put on my MP3 to shut them out.

I was on the brink and I found myself staying up until the wee hours of the morning, going over Lucy’s old blog posts to comfort myself. It was insane.

There’s so much noise around me I can’t hear myself think. When my head hurts, the bickering can be too much for my teeny weeny bit of patience to bear. Does it ever happen to you? I was gasping, craving for some alone & quiet time, I can hardly breathe.

Finally, I said enough. If I wanted to stop being a nasty mother, I needed to do something about it. So after this afternoon’s clinic, I cancelled the next one in the other hospital and freed up the rest of my afternoon. I did the grocery shopping leisurely. Then treated myself to coffee bun and iced mocha. Stared out the window and watched people come and go, scurrying around with their own errands and concerns.

image

And just like that all is well again. I miss the kids and can’t wait to be back home.

**The car aircon has been repaired (new evaporator) and is now as cool as new =)

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Responses

  1. Wow ~ crazy stuff! So nice to read that you found a great way to make things right again and enjoy some moments of relaxation : )

  2. To be honest, this whiney post is now making me fee a bit embarrassed; the delete button is quite tempting! I really appreciate your kind words and your taking time to drop by & comment. Thanks!

  3. LOL ! no, leave the post; you needed to get it out. We all feel that way at some time or other. At times like that, I step back, take a deep breath, and take a mental-health day off from work … and crochet all day!


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